Finding Time

It's funny how when you don't have the time, there are 100 things you are motivated to do... and those days you have the time on your hands, all you want to do is rest!

That is the very predicament I find myself in. This past weekend was mine for the taking... but I was unproductive, did little, and had maybe too much unhealthy fun. At least I spent it with Paul... that always makes me feel like the time was not wasted.

I've noticed that while at work, I say: Maybe I'll go to the gym, go to the park, take a walk, bake a cake, clean the house, iron, etc... Yet once I actually get home... all I want to do is have dinner... curl up in a ball and relax.

I always think... I wish Paul got home earlier from work... so I can see him and spend time with him... Now he is. While I'm in the kitchen cooking, he is in the living room playing XBox or watching TV. I can't blame him... our kitchen is small and he gets in my way. Once dinner is done we eat together but he is up and cleaning up before I even have a chance to swallow. Once its over he's at the computer checking scores or up washing dishes while I watch some TV or lay on the couch and take a nap... I mean fall asleep.

I said - this summer I want to go to the beach, hit up the park, try yoga, go kayaking, plant a garden, etc etc etc....

This summer I've done none of those things... at least I am on my 3rd camping trip and will go to Kayak school next week.

Talk about procrastination.

I know my days aren't filled too much - but I'll be honest... I'm tired. I'm very very tired. And that makes me depressed... I'm 27. I'm healthy. I'm losing it.

I guess they are right... some cardio... a little exercise... maybe it will get me going. It's just finding the motivation to actually do it. Ugh... we shall see. For now I will look forward to the rest of the week....

Tonight - transformers
Tomorrow - some secret stuff to take care of
Thursday - Mommy Yolly date night
Friday - Paul's birthday party #3
Saturday - Mom's annual BBQ
Sunday - play with kids

Then it's more work next week... leading into a 3 day weekend for kayak school and camping with Pauly