Monday, June 7, 2010

Mondays....

PLEASE CLICK FOR LARGER IMAGE

You can click to see the larger image... yep I'm a jerk face!


Paul thought my funny rant this morning was comical and that I should share - so I will.

Today I got to work hoping for a semi busy day of repetitive but necessary work. Instead I was asked by my boss to do something he was more than capable of doing because.... some days - he just does that. It irks me but what irks me more is the incompetence of some people... especially when they get paid more than me and have a power trip.

Yes, I sometimes ask people above me to get shit done. I don't do it because I like to but because that's my job! Yes, you may be a director and I may be a senior but you are in operations and I'm in reporting thus, I still get the big picture and you still get the small one. Tough noogies!

What kills me are the dumb questions. When you get an email that says: Can you please change Y to Z because ABC won't work unless this matches exactly. You have all the info you need except maybe the time-line. You have the action necessary and you have the reason why. So it kills me when someone calls me to ask, "What are the implications of this?"

Define: Implication = something that is inferred (deduced or entailed or implied)

So what is implied by this hmmm... lets see - WTF does that even mean! Ask a valid question. So when I say ... what exactly are you asking she says - Why do we need to do this. Well honey, implication does NOT equal why! This is why I am not surprised by the high unemployment rate.... I mean if you can pay a monkey to do a humans job, why hire a human.

Of course nothing can be easy and nothing I'm doing today is tying out.

But let's start move on with the comical morning commute! I decided after paying my rent late, I'd reward myself with a cup of coffee for the train ride in. After purchasing my tall coffee with room for milk, I headed down into the hot platform and was bombarded by bodies. The trains must be running slow again... Freaking MTA and their cut backs are destroying NYers lives! The F finally comes and I contemplate waiting for the next one. But of course, against my better judgment I hop on. That, my friends, was a bad idea. It was packed tight and the AC ... non existent. After 2 stops I hurried my ass off that train for need of oxygen.

Once the next F rolled in, I kicked myself for not waiting in the 1st place. I might have even gotten a seat. But as my luck would have it, a gentlemen seated right where I was standing got up at the next stop. As I was turning my body to plop my ass in the empty seat, I see this over-sized young woman hurdling her body in my direction. For fear of bodily harm or sweaty fat arm to sweaty fat arm contact, I stopped mid seat and looked at her saying she may go ahead. After all, she may have been having a hot spell or out of breath and might claps from heat stoke any minute. My conscience is far to clean at the moment to have someone's coma or even death on my hands. After an awkward exchange of:
Me: Go Ahead
Her: No you go ahead
Me: Are you sure?
Her: Yes, go ahead
Me: Okay!

I parked my ass down much to the woman next to me's delight. I am by no means a skinny girl, but by comparison, my ass is the smaller of the two. At this point I buried my head in my book, which I finished and ignored all other MTA patrons completely.

I have to say, I'm pretty thankful. That young lady saved my feet and shirt from a sweaty morning... which likely saved my boss my attitude upon coming in to him being late yet again.

And for your pleasure: http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/chi/68269419.html

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are lucky that I'm the only one who reads this blog.

Regardless, I will still punch you in the boob.

Katherine said...

This actually made me really laugh at loud...especially the part where you were threatened with a punch to the boob.