I'm having a hard time getting myself excited about this weekend. Sure I'll be with Sierra people... one's I've never met before and some that I have. I'll be snowboarding. I'll be in VT. The alcohol will be flowing and I'll be happy. But I'm having a hard time getting excited about it... and I think I know why.
I'm not looking forward to Friday.
In an ideal world, I'd be carpooling up to VT with some SS people... arriving around between 8 and 10 PM if not earlier. Partying at the cocktail party. Trying on demos. Meeting Rome sales representatives. Eating dinner with the gang. And getting to know new people.
Instead I'll be driving to Boston - way out of the way so that Paul can get his stuff and so that we can pick up Andy who won't be arriving until 10:30 PM. Then we will be off to VT ... another 3.5 hours. We won't be getting there till 1:30-2AM. I'll be missing all the Friday night festivities. I'll be tired for Saturday riding. And I will probably go the day not meeting anyone new till at night as it usually works out for big groups.
Here is the part that rubs me wrong... Andy could have flown with a stop over from DFW to Burlington, VT (not far from Stowe) but he will only fly American. Because he has 'status'. Well you know what... big fucking deal! Make an exception. That way you are not inconveniencing others. I was expecting Paul to be in Boston any how - but you know what... he's not. So Boston wouldn't have even been on the route of places to go but now we must. 2nd... Andy is flying out of a different airport than Paul and I from Tahoe too... why? Because of American. I just think at this point it's selfish.
All in all, I think I should have just left after work and went alone. Left them to their own devices but I had already agreed. However, I agreed under an understanding that was not the truth. But it's okay... I'll get there when I get there and I'll make the best of the time I have there. The long drive though... I'm not looking forward to.
It's funny how these SS trips are working out. I went from going alone to rolling in with Paul and Andy. But I guess it's okay. These are still my friends... not theirs. I talk to them every day. I care about them and they care about me. WA and Tahoe will be on my terms. I won't let them dictate my schedule. Every man for themselves. I did a lot to help them be able to attend all these events. I'm sure they appreciate them. It just sucks being on my end...
I need to give less ... at least once in a while. I need my thing. I need my outlet. I thought this was it... but it didn't really work out that way. Maybe I will find something yet....