Last night my cousin and I went out for some wine and shared eats. It was nice. Peaceful. We could talk. We could talk about anything. It's why it's good to do that once in a while.
So what I've realized... people think Paul and I are kinda strange.
No, I don't sit at home missing him.
No, I don't talk to him on a regular basis while he's gone.
No, I don't ponder our future.
No, I don't mind our time apart.
No, a long distance engagement isn't too hard
No, planning a wedding apart isn't impossible
No, we aren't always great
Yes, we will be always fine!
I don't know if we are a model couple. The kind others should strive to be. We don't fit anyone's version of successful relationship, but we work. We found out that life is better when we are together (literally or not) than when we are apart. We found out that our days are brighter when we know the other has you on their mind. We found out that we'd sacrifice to create a better us (not to be confused with sacrificing yourself to make a better him/her).
It's not easy. It's not black. It's not white. It's not fast. It's not slow. It's not strait.
It is spontaneous. It is complex. It is hard. It is all gray, black, red, green and yellow. It is every changing. It is ever moving. It is connected with all and connected with nothing. It is mysterious.
It will never be understood.
It will be explored. Just like anything else. We will fall. We will fail. We will succeed. We will try... we will continue always to try.
I live my life... and Paul lives his. Sometimes we are living that life together. But when we are not... we are supporting each other in living our own lives. My life will always be my own... as his will always be his own... but sometimes... just sometimes... that life is joined and at those times... life seems near perfect. So the few times our lives can align... make living life apart worth it.
Maybe that's why it works?