Wednesday, August 25, 2010

But I wanna go....

Last night on the plane ride home from TX, Paul told me his brother wants to have his birthday party in Miami and wanted him to talk to me about it. I knew why immediately... it wasn't the "Lil, want to spend the last weekend of September in the sunny beachy weather of Miami to celebrate A's 27th birthday?" talk, it was the "Lil, A wants to have a guys weekend in Miami for his birthday. You are okay with me going right?" talk.

Of course I'm okay with him going. Of course I'm also jealous. Being A's sister (in-law [future]) doesn't guarantee the same benefits as being A's brother (in any form). Because he's single. Because his best friends are all getting married (including his brother) in the next year or 2. Because I'm a girl. So I get left out of this trip too.

Paul and A have at least annual brother trips where Paul heads down to TX or A heads up to Chicago or Boston. This year they did a few more. Their dad being ill and our engagement changes perspective. Family becomes more important and old times are becoming faded into the past. Brother time is seldom and greatly cherished and of course there must be a fear that it may not exist in the same way post marriage. I must admit, that I feared something similar with my sister but the opposite was the case. Spending so much time together and trusting so much, you tend to encourage sister/brother/friend time in order to not lose a sense of self.

I hope that they have fun. Yes I'll be jealous holding down the fort here in NYC while Paul goes from Boston to Miami without a stop for a kiss on the forehead for his woman... stuck somewhere in between. But none the less, it's a jealousy I can swallow and say that I''' 100% hope that they have a grand time.

Now if I find out any other friends or relatives are invited + 1's ... then all this happy pushing myself to be excited for them crap will fall through the cracks and right out the window. Then it's personal and not fair. Then those boy's must fear my wrath hahaha.

So to A's big 2-7 in the MIA!

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